The Rationale Of Prostitution

Backbencher January 3, 2013 12
The Rationale Of Prostitution

I’m not going to give you the raft of sensible reasons behind it; I won’t be speaking about how it’s safer for the women in question to be working in a clean, regulated brothel rather than around the back of my local park toilets. I won’t go on about personal freedoms, opening the door to unionization, more jobs or giving the economy a boost and so forth.  No, none of that, I’ll be explaining a reason behind it that was thought up during a wet and windy day in Rotherham with Olly Neville.

I think it should be legal, because slipping a girl (or boy if you’re a Tory MP) a bundle of twenty quid notes for a good time is in no way different to taking a girl out on a date. In fact, the prostitution is likely to be the quicker opinion.

Ladies, I hate to break it to you, but when that cute boy in your Sixth form /university/workplace asked you out for a drink last Tuesday, he didn’t do it because he thinks you might one day kiss in the rain, fall in love, get married, have kids and grow old together. He did it because that pencil skirt and see through blouse you wear makes him ‘hot under the collar’.  Why? Because your life isn’t a Taylor Swift song.

Here is where I start making my point, there isn’t any deceit involved with prostitution. That’s just not the case on a date, you share a drink, laughing and grinning all the way, however if you’ll pardon my coarse Northern phrase, he just wants to get into your underwear. I think a good amount of gentlemen reading this article will admit that sometime in our lives, we’ve told a porky to try to advance our chances with a lass. (Cue the onslaught on ‘gentlemen’ protesting their innocence – you’re all liars).

Anyway, I’m digressing. He seems nice, so you agree to see him again, this time you go to some swanky restaurant, complete with your own French waiter (If you’re Southern) or your own greasy student (If you’re Northern) you reach for your purse but he refuses to allow you to pay.

Which is worse: exchanging money for sex, or exchanging money for items in the hope of getting sex? Because that’s what it really is when you boil it down, behind the smile and bluster, he’s forking out 50 quid because he wants to get it on, again, lads, we’ve all attempted this in our lives. Simple truth of the matter has it that way.

Prostitution should be legal because, bizarrely, it’s more open, you know exactly what you’re buying.

 

Gareth Shanks is the current Elections Officer for Young Independence as well as being Secretary for Young Independence in Yorkshire. A former infantryman in the Territorial Army, he tweets as @Garathshanks

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  • Ben Mcdermott

    Do you value your winnings via the quality and cost mechanism then? 9/10 and only a £20 date – ‘ace’

  • Georgia Phillips

    Doesn’t everyone do that, Ben? ;)

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  • James

    Aahahahahahahhahahahah

    hahahahahahahah

    aaaahahhahahah

    This article is so self-explanatory…if the author really has these abhorrent views, then no wonder the only women he can get to fuck him are ones that he lavishes with gifts.

  • Gareth Shanks

    I would like to add that this is done with a large pot of sarcasm and tongue in cheekness!

    (also it’s @garethshanks)

  • Joe

    Why are these views abhorrent?

  • Ashley

    It is done with exceptional illiteracy. Safe, controlled prostitution is exactly what those in the sector have long campaigned for. ‘Sarcasm’ and ‘tongue in cheekness’ (sic) simply reveals a rather stereotypical lack of understanding. And a certain immaturity. The topic is relevant; the writing is not.

  • Gareth Shanks

    Oh and to answer you Ben, If I can get a 9/10 date for £20, I’d be jumping over the bloody moon lad.

  • Ashley
  • Alasdair

    Er, does the writer of this article know that prostitution *is* legal in England? That is, it is legal to exchange money for sex and vice versa. What is illegal is soliciting or procuring prostitution, or ‘living off immoral earnings’ (running a brothel, etc).

    It’s worth knowing the facts on something before you write about it. There’s a reasonable argument to be made that the whole business should be legalised, but this article isn’t it.

  • Beth

    I have to say, this is pretty accurate. The guys who ask for a discount because they think they’re cute are a bit annoying, though.

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