The Rationale Of Prostitution

Backbencher January 3, 2013 12
The Rationale Of Prostitution

I’m not going to give you the raft of sensible reasons behind it; I won’t be speaking about how it’s safer for the women in question to be working in a clean, regulated brothel rather than around the back of my local park toilets. I won’t go on about personal freedoms, opening the door to unionization, more jobs or giving the economy a boost and so forth.  No, none of that, I’ll be explaining a reason behind it that was thought up during a wet and windy day in Rotherham with Olly Neville.

I think it should be legal, because slipping a girl (or boy if you’re a Tory MP) a bundle of twenty quid notes for a good time is in no way different to taking a girl out on a date. In fact, the prostitution is likely to be the quicker opinion.

Ladies, I hate to break it to you, but when that cute boy in your Sixth form /university/workplace asked you out for a drink last Tuesday, he didn’t do it because he thinks you might one day kiss in the rain, fall in love, get married, have kids and grow old together. He did it because that pencil skirt and see through blouse you wear makes him ‘hot under the collar’.  Why? Because your life isn’t a Taylor Swift song.

Here is where I start making my point, there isn’t any deceit involved with prostitution. That’s just not the case on a date, you share a drink, laughing and grinning all the way, however if you’ll pardon my coarse Northern phrase, he just wants to get into your underwear. I think a good amount of gentlemen reading this article will admit that sometime in our lives, we’ve told a porky to try to advance our chances with a lass. (Cue the onslaught on ‘gentlemen’ protesting their innocence – you’re all liars).

Anyway, I’m digressing. He seems nice, so you agree to see him again, this time you go to some swanky restaurant, complete with your own French waiter (If you’re Southern) or your own greasy student (If you’re Northern) you reach for your purse but he refuses to allow you to pay.

Which is worse: exchanging money for sex, or exchanging money for items in the hope of getting sex? Because that’s what it really is when you boil it down, behind the smile and bluster, he’s forking out 50 quid because he wants to get it on, again, lads, we’ve all attempted this in our lives. Simple truth of the matter has it that way.

Prostitution should be legal because, bizarrely, it’s more open, you know exactly what you’re buying.


Gareth Shanks is the current Elections Officer for Young Independence as well as being Secretary for Young Independence in Yorkshire. A former infantryman in the Territorial Army, he tweets as @Garathshanks

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