Nick Griffin’s Updated CV

There’s a very good chance Nick Griffin will lose his job today, so we’ve updated his CV to help with his job hunting….


Name: Nick Griffin (former) MEP
Residence: Llanerfyl, Powys, Wales, GREAT Britain…obviously
D.O.B: 01.03.1959

Downing College, Cambridge. Law & History (2:2)*
*Would have been a double first, but I think the examiner was Jewish.

Current Employment:
OberGruppenFuhrer Chairman of the British National Party.

Previous Employment:
-MEP for North West England, 04.06.2009 to 22.05.2014
Reason for leaving: I’d rather not talk about it.

-Worked with white power skinhead band, Skrewdriver.
Reason for leaving: They were shit.

-Editor of The Rune, National Front newsletter.
Reason for leaving: I was shit.

-National Front candidate and activist 1972 to 1989.
Reason for leaving: The NF were too soft and fluffy for my taste.

Customer Service Skills:
1998, suspended sentence for distributing material likely to incite racial hatred.
2006, charged and acquitted of inciting racial hatred.
Steward at a Holocaust Denial Meeting lead by David Irving.
Refused access to the Queens Garden Party.

Financial Acumen:
Twice declared bankrupt. (Zionist bankers, you see.)
2009 Electoral Commission investigation into transparency of BNP funding.
BNP left on brink of collapse.

International Links:
Single handedly stopped World War 3 by taking a EU tax payer financed jolly to Syria. You’re welcome.
Tried (and failed) to secure funding by seeking alliances with Mohmar Gaddafi’s Libya and the Ayatollah’s Iran. (My patriotism is…flexible)
If Prime Minister I would invite Ireland to join a confederation of the British Isles, because I alone can tell the Irish are desperate to be subjugated again.

Personal Statement:
I am a high profile celebrity and intentional statesman; it says so on my leaflets so it must be true. Under the constitution of the BNP I have full executive powers over all party affairs, though the collapse in membership and crippling debts are probably somebody else’s fault. I work well alone or as part of a team, provided the team does not include, Muslims, blacks, Asians, Europeans, gays, Jews, Muslims, gypsies, lesbians, cultural Marxist, Muslims, hippies and feminists. (Did I mention Muslims?)
I will require a company car, preferably a 1930s black open top Mercedes with an eagle or iron cross painted on the side.

Bashir al-Assad, President of the Syrian Arab Republic, PO Box 1, Presidential Palace, Damascus, Syria.

Barry the Bigot, propping up the bar, The Red Lion pub, Dagenham, London.


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