The alphabet according to the Labour Party

A is for Anti-Semitism, which definitely doesn’t exist in the Labour Party (and don’t let the Zionist media tell you any different).

B is for Britain, a country which achieved some prominence thanks to slavery and exploitation. 

C is for Corbyn, the wisest and best dressed human in recorded history.

D is for Cat, according to Diane Abbott anyway.

E is for Economics. Which means something probably. 

F is for Fucked, which is what our party is right now.

G is for General Election. Oh bugger.

H is for Hitler. See also Nigel Farage and Boris Johnson.

I is for Islington, the centre of the British Labour movement.

J is for Jesus. See also Emily Thornberry.

K is for Kulaks, who should be liquidated as a class.

L is for Latvia, which ought to belong to Russia.

M is for McDonnell, who definitely didn’t support the IRA (and he has witnesses to prove it).

N is for Nazi, a technical term for people who don’t read the Morning Star.

O is for Oscar, which is what Ken Loach should have won for ‘I, Daniel Blake’.

P is for Pissed, which is what you have to be to vote for us.  

Q is for Queen. See also Hag and Parasite.

R is for Racist, which you almost certainly are.

S is for Socialism, which will work next time it’s tried.

T is for Thatcher, who probably ate your hamster. See also Satan.

U is for United States of America. Like Mordor but real.

V is for Venezuela, a South American socialist paradise (please don’t investigate further).

W is for Warsaw Pact, who should have won the Cold War.

X is for Wilson, if you were educated at a school we ranked as ‘Outstanding’.

Y is for Yoga, which should be made compulsory.

Z is for Zimbabwe, which is what we’ll turn the British economy into.


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